Happiness Project: Personal Commandments

The enduring output of my 2020 Happiness Project is a draft list of personal commandments. These are concepts that emerged and resonated for me throughout the year. They are listed in chronological order (i.e., ideas that arose in January are first), and this list is still a work in progress.

Create space: Creating space in my life by eliminating things like clutter, unnecessary commitments, and low-value to-dos gives me the freedom to focus on the things that truly matter to me.

Make time to play: I tend to deprioritize play (e.g., doodling, coloring, building with LEGO bricks), but when I make time for it I feel recharged and bring more energy and creativity to my work.

Less is more: I often overcommit and sign up for all the things. I’ve learned I’m happier when I can fully commit to a small number of important things.

GEIGE: This stands for “Good Enough is Good Enough.” I’m a recovering perfectionist, and I’ve learned to set the bar lower for most things in my life.

Cultivate tranquility: The “background feeling” I want to experience in my life is tranquility. I intentionally choose habits that support this feeling.

Look where you want to go: I choose to focus more energy on the things that I want in my life and the things for which I am grateful, rather than the negatives. Our thoughts create our reality.

Be intentional: I’m making purposeful choices about the way I spend my time and energy.

Strive to thrive: This is a reminder to make choices that support thriving and stay out of survival mode.

Assume positive intent: When we don’t know why someone said or did something, it can be easy to assume a negative intent. When we choose to assume the intention was positive, it guides our behavior and thoughts in a more constructive direction.

Rewrite the narrative: My head is often filled with negative stories and limiting beliefs. I aim to reframe those stories in a positive and supportive manner.

Eliminate mental clutter: My brain in often full of to-dos, worries, hypothetical scenarios, and much more. Clearing that clutter out of my mind helps me live with tranquil intentionality.

Be present, Kim; Be Present Kim: Both of these sayings remind me to stay in the present moment.

What would Future Kim do? When I’m unsure of a decision, it can help me to think about what choice would best support my future self.

Do it now: This is a reminder to use the 2-minute rule. If something can be done in two minutes or less, do it right now rather than putting it off.

More praising, less judging: Being judgmental (of myself and others) comes naturally to me. My world is a happier place when I substitute praise for judgment.

Don’t cross the bridge until you come to it: I often plan for or worry about hypothetical future situations which may never come to pass. This reminds me to focus on real situations when they are actually occurring rather than hypothetical ones.

Imagine Kimpossibility: Kimpossibility represents all of the unknown things that I can be and achieve in the future. I give myself permission to imagine those possibilities and make them real!

Connection is everything; Everything is connected: I’ve learned how important it is to me to connect to other people in a meaningful way. Those connections cause meaningful ripples into the world.

Embrace healthy deviance: Pilar Gerasimo coined the “Healthy Deviant” term: one who willingly defies unhealthy norms and conventions in order to achieve a high level of vitality, resilience, and autonomy. I’m learning from Pilar how to be healthy in our unhealthy world.

Choose the red pill: this is a nod to The Matrix. Choose the path of life-changing truth rather than the path of inertia and blissful ignorance.